Flight! Flames! Fun!

I saw the most disturbing billboard in downtown KC this morning.
A poster announcing the following: FLIGHT! FLAMES! FUN!
This was set in bold type against what appeared to be an image of a burning aircraft.
As it was incomprehensible in all other messaging, I couldn’t work out what the heck it was all about, BUT I shivered with the feeling that it was advertising a venue full of crashing aircraft, body bags, escape shoots and life jackets, all served up with a "Medieval Times" banquet style chicken-finger basket.

Now that’s entertainment!

What happened to the art of the simple message? The 4-second rule? If you can’t read a billboard in 4 seconds you’ve passed it by. Don’t they teach this stuff anymore?
I am constantly amazed as to how much money is wasted on this advertising medium.
Hitler’s PR man Rudolph Hess maintained that people can only retain 4 words, in other words: make it simple.
"Ein Reich! Ein Volk! Ein Furer!" OK that’s six words but I get his point, even though I abhor his politics.

I remember seeing a billboard for "Baby dolls!" which was really simple. A big, busty seductive woman and an address.
The only problem was its location. Being close to home and therefore visible to my kids I was constantly bugged to go and visit the "doll shop." My kids being convinced it was the mother lode for "Beanie Babies." An outlet center for the terminally cute and therefore heaven.
Erm.. sort of.

I like billboards that make a quick visual impact and then allow you to go about your day without causing multi-car pile-ups on the interstate.
Unfortunately I see headlines like the following all the time, usually set in mouse type: “Stop by St.Marty’s Institute for the deaf, Kansas City’s leading treatment center for the partial or total hearing impaired, parking is free, come by today, you will be impressed, Thank you, have a great day!” and then, of course there’s the body copy. Good luck with the speed reading. Zoooooooom.

Billboards should be short and sharp.

Here at NK we’re preparing an awareness campaign that will run around town. One billboard simply states: You will read this! (4 words!) with copy that says: You will then go here.. followed by the website. I also have the desire to have a billboard positioned as you cross the Missouri river into KC stating: Welcome to Cleveland!
But that’s just my strange idea of humor.

So look for those billboards on the way home and ask yourself “What are they trying to say?” And then try to avoid
rear-ending the car that’s braking in front. The one with the driver trying to jot down the number for ‘Baby dolls’.

Make it simple stupid. (4 words!)